*sixsixsixsixsixsixsixsixsixsixsixsix. 2001-11-13 12:35 a.m.*

michael just left, because i was about to fall asleep. and then i got up and peed, and it hit me that today would have been the 6 month anniversary. part of me is celebrating that one of the most amazing things to ever happen to me started 6 months ago, but it also makes me sad that we didn't quite make it this far. i feel like if there were some rule that james was not allowed to break up with me, and that i was the only person allowed to do the breaking up, i would have held onto our relationship with everything i had, trying my damnedest to make it work, till we were both completely worn out, and it was yucky, and there was nothing left of the goodness that got us together in the first place. so i guess i'm lucky that there isn't that rule.

but yes, forgive me if i am mopy today. i get lost in could have beens sometimes, and it's easy to miss things that were bad for you when you remember how they felt soooo good. and forgive me if i get a misplaced goofy grin on my face, when i remember how it all started, because oh, it was good, she was good, we were good.

and forgive me if i change the subject to my kitten and how she appears to have a crush on michael, and might be in heat, because she keeps licking my blanket and rolling around and drooling and just acting very silly. she just tried to attack a mosquito that was on my ceiling, and jumped from my computer to the ceiling where she hit the bug, to the ground with a big thud. but she appears to be fine, except for more blanket licking.

*listening to: *
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