*but it really wasn't that platonic, sam, was it? 2001-06-12 2:33 a.m.*

avoiding sleep again. i'm getting too good at this. and i for some ridiculous reason decided that i HAVE to wake up before 10 tomorrow. i doubt i'll think the same when the alarm goes off, but we'll see. i think it's that i have an interview at 2, so i'd like my usual 4 hours of alone time before having to face other human beings (or human being... which would be mom...). i like being alone when i write letters and stuff. and i feel like i'm more productive before my mom comes home and witnesses how unproductive i've been, making me feel even less productive. yes.

went offline, meaning to sleep soon, but found myself reading the silver kiss and writing in the secret journal. asked the tarot some questions, asked the faeries' oracle a question. logged the answers in the secret journal. mainly reassuring. came online, email from jennifer connelly, made me happy and reassured.

had a good talk with sam earlier tonight, while reading pixie's dad's view of love. i asked him if i could post it here, but he beat me to it. i wonder if i even said anything or if i'm just a hypocritical idealist dreamer girl. but i did enjoy the conversation.

i feel so young sometimes.

*listening to: *
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