*i hear that malraux got a mix tape from florida? not from me at all, of course. 2001-12-26 1:06 p.m.*

this holiday season, i have gotten in contact with family: my mom, my dad, my stepmom, my half-sister, my dad's mom, my mom's mom, my mom's dad, my mom's sister; friends from wisconsin: neelloc, nurse, lust; and friends from high school i hadn't thought of in ages: methodist's (ex)girlfriend, and the kids who i'm going to the alehouse with tonight.

but despite a number of attempts i have not been able to get ahold of best friend. last year, she called up my mom on christmas to make sure she wasn't spending it alone. and then the three of us went out for my birthday at sweet tomatoes. and then we emailed over the summer, because she finally got an email account. that account died with her internet connection, but i was able to call her for her birthday in august. and now her phone number has been disconnected. if she still works where she used to work, i might be able to get ahold of her that way, though i'm not sure. that's sort of scary in a way. calling a day care center (that i used to work at), trying to find an employee who may or may not work there. does that seem dodgy to you folks? but i would like to see her. i got her a pretty, and besides all that, it would just be nice to see the girl who i went through all the middle school and high school shit with. we pored over books in the mall together, we gossiped on the phone till her dad put a limit on our amount of phone time, she called boys i had crushes on for me, i made her laugh when her dad died, we had numberless sleepovers and knew each other's houses as well as our own, we tortured and were tortured by her little brother, we had the magic and wonder of me moving away and then coming back and finding out nothing had changed, we went through her first boyfriend, and my first boyfriend, we even stayed close after she got together with dan despite the fact that he hated me and no matter what she had to see him once a day, i slept in her bed after we started going to new college and she'd spend the night at his, but after she moved off campus, way out the hell to the beneva/bee ridge area where i used to live, we haven't really been in so much contact, though she took me out for ice cream and swings when the exish and i broke upish. we still have good times when we see each other, but it's not quite as much like it never changed as it used to be. i wish we'd see each other more, and we always pledge too do just that, but with my lack of self-transportation, and her love of the boy, it hasn't happened. bleh. i do miss her.

(link: rivertrout.com, a library of letters. she's not much of a letter writer, but i thought this was an appropriate link for this entry. of course it has the requisite "terrorists will fail" letter on it, but it's pretty safe and nice once you get past that... mm... letters...)

*listening to: *
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