*"she said, 'he just left.'" 2002-05-28 1:53 p.m.*

at about 1 am this morning, my grandma's husband died. he;s not my grandfather, and i'm not sure how many husbands my grandma has had. i think this is probably the 4th (my dad and his two sisters are each on their 3rd marriages right now), though i think only one of those was a divorce, the other husbands died.

it's kind of weird that he's dead, but as i said in yesterday's entry, probably a good thing in a lot of ways. a way i didn't mention is that i think it's good that he died now, rather than 10 or 20 years ago, when people were wishing he was dead. he could be the most asshole man in the world when he wanted to be. i don't know all of the details, but for a long time, my dad's sisters really wanted them to get a divorce. it seemed, from the way they talked, that he was verbally abusive and very demanding. the only story i really know is that early in my parents' marriage, they rented a house from him, and then when they moved out, they left some things in the garage to get later, and he scattered them all over the lawn. it rained, and that's the reason my mom's wedding veil no longer exists.

but in his old age, he seriously mellowed, and i think my dad and his sisters all came to like him, and so... yeah...

the funeral is friday. i'm not sure if i want to go. i'm not sure how i feel, or how i'm supposed to feel, and i wonder if the funeral would give me a hint at either.

*listening to: *
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