*bed. 2001-11-27 12:06 p.m.*

i just want to slip quietly out the backdoor of this year, and prepare for next year's grand entrance.

today started out similar to yesterday, but instead of cozy bedness, it was a fight against the cold of the world. except it felt like it was all inside me.

i feel like a failure this year. at all the things i was so good at last year. emotional strength, money management, academia, life. or maybe i was always bad at it, and i just can glorify past times because i'm not in them.

and so i lay in bed, scolding myself for how much time i lay in bed. who needs to smile and laugh, who needs money, a house, food, who needs a degree, who needs anything when they can just have bed.

*listening to: *
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