*"Longbottom, kindly do not reveal that you can't even perform a simple Switching Spell in front of anyone from Durmstrang!" Professor McGonagall barked at the end of one particularly difficult lesson, during which Neville accidentally transplanted 2001-06-24 8:41 p.m.*

i am sleepy. it has been a day of nap thwarting, which is in some ways a form of dream thwarting, as without naps, there are no dreams. but i looked through hallelujah anyway and that's a pretty dreamlike book, so.... something. it means something i don't know what. hallelujah anyway is some intense stuff. my mom used to have it next to brian froud's faeries, which we didn't even own but somebody left at our house and eventually retrieved. anyway, i remember looking at it and getting freaked out by all the skullish creatures, but fascinated by the pretty girls disney and pornographic (is that redundant?). i don't know where it disappeared to. she may still have it somewhere. but i found a copy at the oxfam bookshop in cambridge that i worked at, and bought it. and now i have it, and i page through it from time to time. i usually only just flip to random pages, because it's pretty intense, but i stared at all the pictures today. but napping was never accomplished really. a short sort of doze off about an hour ago, but that's really been it. i tried to nap a bunch and kept saying i was going to nap a bunch but got distracted.

and my brain is very fuzzed and i say things and they come out slowly, and then i think about what i said and they still don't make sense.

yes.

church was good today. i liked the service. it was about not making too strict rules and stuff. i went to coffee hour like i do and talked to my usual round of retirees, and this new woman who said, "i can't see, but i don't think i know you. i don't recognize your voice." and i discovered that the really nice woman i always talk to is the minister's wife. and then i had an appointment with this really sweet woman who was there my first sunday. she didn't want to buy anything because she's retired, etc., and her kids just bought her new knives anyway. and she didn't have anyone to refer me to, because she's new to the area and anyway basically just knows people who are "in the same boat." but she used to sell clothing in a similar way to the way i'm selling knives, and she says i'm a "regular card" and that i'll do great once i get some referrals.

i finally told regina, my manager, that i'd be going to jacksonville to visit james, and apparently someone else already told her. gr-rar! she's fine with it, just wishes i'd told her sooner. she's so good at guilt-tripping. i called her as she was getting ready for her sister's wedding. the company is sooo her life. it's pretty eerie. she never told us about the wedding, but was like, "call me on my cell phone blah blah blah." it's bizarre to think of her as having a life outside the office. she's so corporate and gung-ho about selling cutlery.

what else? hm... oh, people have been doing my poll, which is exciting. the pirates are in the lead, with circus people pretty far behind and no votes for pirates in the circus. i'm not sure how long i'll keep it up. i may change it to something else eventually or just remove it altogether, but it's something i'm genuinely curious about. when i was in high school i'd ask people, "when i quit school, should i: a) join the circus or b) become a pirate?" and most people voted for b. yay pirates! i'm all about pirates! i was talking to diana one night and i told her about wanting to run away and become a pirate and she said, "i once knew a pirate," and since her dad lives in greece and all that, i was all intrigued by the exoticness of it. "really?" "yeah, he had a pirated video store."

*listening to: *
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