*a "quick" entry. 2002-04-16 2:00 a.m.*

michael is currently waiting to use my computer again, so i think this will be short. but the need to vent is with me right now, and so i'm going to do it. i want to go to bed soon, and she has half a 5 page paper left to write, so i stole my computer back from her to tell you about my day.

you know, today, things were really starting to look up. i realized, i think, where my funk is coming from, and decided to talk to my husband about that. the state of my kitchen should not be the biggest stressor in my life, but it is. i'm not sure if that says more about the ease of my life or the state of my kitchen. i think a little of both.

anyway... i had a pretty chill day after that. i went to the 4 winds and worked on a letter and watched a good chunk of metropolis in the anthro lab with retro and this other girl who i want to give a cool name to, but i don't have the brain energy. actually, initially this entry was going to be my philosophizing about what kind of 1920's film star i would be, and how i think the girl in metropolis was probably a fun chick to hang around with, but that got overtaken by other more recent things. and then retro and i chatted until i was good and late for yoga, but they'd already started so i didn't have to feel guilty, but it hadn't gone far enough that i felt unwarmed up and stuff. and then jennifer connelly and laurel tree and i discussed housing situations for next year and since we hadn't heard from the boy, decided that we should go for the girl we'd interviewed and decided that a good way to tell her was to invite her to ham center for pizza. except after ordering the pizza, we couldn't get ahold of her.

and then i went and saw the celluloid closet in heiser. it started really late because of technical difficulties, but it was so good and so worth the wait, and then i was planning my entry about how glad i was to be gay and how familial it feels sometimes and how even though i've had a relatively easy queer life, i've still had friends who've stopped talking to me, friends that are still praying that i'll change, and many awkward moments of not being able to hold hands with or kiss my girlfriend in certain situations and how much that pissed me off, but yo, it's good to be gay.

and then i went to michael's and said she could use my computer and all was right in my little world, with a roommate for next year, and happiness in being gay, and resolve for how to make my next few months better.

except i came home to 40 pissed off im messages. my trying to help backfired up my ass and bureaucracy is being it's lying evil bitchiest. my sexy elf mom is going to go and yell and hit things tomorrow for me, so there's some satisfaction in that, but yeah. i'm tired, i'm pissed, and i have someone pissed off at me and rightly enraged at this school.

so i got on the phone to whinge to people while michael used my computer and found out all kinds of new things. the girl who was going to live with us found alternate plans and due to a convoluted series of events, james may be our 4th roommate next year. i think that may actually work, especially since we decided on the phone today that our way of dealing with problems is to yell "blaaaah!" at each other. but yeah. so there's drama there.

and despite the note with promises of a clean kitchen early in the am, there is no husband around for me to confront and be brave and lay down rules with.

bobo pissing fucker assmunch slutmuffin fart heads! that's all i've got to say.

(ps, in all my desire to write a quick entry, i forgot to write about my glee and excitement about the fact that there is a definite queer ball date and it is may 11, which is my birthday!)

*listening to: *
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