*someone signed my guestbook saying they liked my entries here... so i posted one. 2002-09-27 11:42 a.m.*

sometimes your fear is the very thing you're afraid of, you know? like if you let go of all the fears then things would start to make sense and life could just happen, but as you grab onto your fears and try to keep life from hurting, it's just going to hurt more.

but i think that's something you have to learn. you can't be told.

i have been trying to figure out how a person can hold pain in this way and i've at least found the rhythm of dancing when you hold your pain like that, but that doesn't mean that i've found the pain, but i've at least found that difference between the two of us. i dance to embrace the sky.

meanwhile, there was drunkenness that included kissing and i know have 2 small marks on my neck, one on each side, that were not meant to confuse me, and didn't at the time, and don't really now. or at least i'm not confused like maybe one would think. i'm always confused, of course. it's what i do.

i don't think it's ever going to stop hurting until we let it.

*listening to: *
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