*make love with each other be free with each other be prisoners of love till you lie in the sod be friends to each other forgive one another see god in each other be beggars to god. 2001-06-04 8:59 p.m.*

so, i got all excited about how i knew who everyone on the diaryring was, once again, when i checked the list of who lists me as a favorite because i'm that big of a metadiarydork, and someone i'm not sure of has linked to me. i have a suspect, and they actually signed my guestbook if it's who i think it is, but i just don't know. i should know because i should remember who did the blackbird piece... but i don't... why am i so obsessed with these things!

anyway... i had the infamous target interview today and thanks to a very supportive email from the james girl (oh, my rockstar life, with my friends hilary swank and jennifer conelly, and my girlfriend james taylor), i went there in a pretty good mood. i'd been terrified for awhile. they are so corporate and big, and juvenalia'd said all that about how they're jerks and stuff, but i need a job so badly. but i went to the interview and it rocked. the woman who interviewed me was so sweet and we kept on talking about things not even related to the interview and she said that if she could she'd hire me, but she wasn't the manager, but that she was pretty sure they would hire me and i should get a call soon, but if not, i should call on wednesday. yay! it seems like a much more easy going place than the one in bradenton.

afterwards we went to optimart, and i picked out my new frames. i'd tried them on when my hair was growing out after i'd shaved it, and i looked like all these pictures of my dad when he was 13, but now that i'm "champagne blond" they look really good. i liked them with the brown hair, too, but it creeped mom out.

(it's fundering. i shoudl not be online.)

we came back home and i talked to my husband about his old job at target, and he made it seem not hellish, while my mom watched general hospital. afterwards we went to k(a)m(e-ap)art, and i got some new shoes, a new exciting bra (the kind that's pink and blue and shiny and mermaid like... it looked like vanna white's dress tonight), some underwear, and the boxers i'm wearing right now. then we went to publix to get subs, but the veggies looked really gross, so i just got ice cream, and cola. i'm pmsing and the washed out tomatoes made me feel really dizzy, and i had to hold onto things while i was waiting in the checkout line. the old woman behind me commented on the man behind her's hershey's kisses and how good they looked, and he offered her one, but she said she was diabetic. it was really cute.

and then back home where i downed a 24 oz bottle of water, and ate a cheese sandwich and sat with a blanket until i stopped feeling chilled and dizzy. then i got up and rooted through my stuff for magazines, got a pair of scissors, and had fun cutting stuff out. until james called and we had a fantastic conversation. oh, i want to hug that girl right now. i still get filled with such excitement that we're together and stuff.

i'm listening to "beggars to god" on double indemnity's cows in the castle cd. yum yum yum! that song still gives me shivers. i never saw them at faire this year, which is sad because i saw them every day last year, even if it was my entire break for the day. i had such a crush on gypsy trash that year though, so it wasn't just for the music.

so... um, i've been debating on whether to write about this, but i think i'm just going to make brief mention of it, because even though i was obsessign about it at 1 am this morning, it doesn't seem so big now. but yeah, i had sex for the first time a year ago this morning (at probably like 1 am). i'm not sure what that means. but it's an anniversary of sorts i suppose.

incidentally, my dad's birthday is in a week. which would make that a 2 year anniversary for his last jail stay, for the time he hit his stepdaughter.

i found my old diaries, except for the oldest one which is packed from school. i was putting up entries on my other site (before i knew sam was! before i knew anyone else from nc had an olj!) from that diary. but i think it would be good to put more up this summer, but i don't have ftp access here, so i'm not sure what i'm going to do. maybe i'll start a new diaryland diary just for old entries, to hold onto them until i can post them on ftp? or should i post them here? if you'd have a problem with that, let the guestbook know.

okay... going.

*listening to: *
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