*let it blossom, let it grow. 2003-04-21 1:46 a.m.*

you know how sometimes you meet someone and you click right away and everything is peachy and you seem to connect on every level. and this person gets you on a deep core level. and it's really pretty amazing.

and then something pretty big happens in your life, and it really changes the way you deal with just about everything. and they miss some vital ingredient of this change. suddenly all your interactions with them become really painful and you really need to have very low doses of them in your life because their way of interacting with you just hits all the wrong buttons.

and so you distance yourself from them. you're never actually mean, but you just don't hang out with them as much as you used to, because things are just too different now. you love them as deeply as you ever did, but sometimes you forget why... where this connection came from, because it doesn't feel like it's there anymore.

and so time passes, lots of time, and you don't see this person much, but then one day you go and visit, and at the end of the visit, there is this hug, this absolutely perfect "i remember why you told me my hugs felt like home because yours always felt like home to me and this is just like that" kind of hugs.

and there is this great joy but also this sadness for the loss of the closeness that was once there. because it's never going to be how it was.

*listening to: "layla" - eric clapton*
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