*it's time to come together. it's up to you. what's your pleasure. 2001-12-14 10:52 p.m.*

it's one of those nights where i feel the desperate need to write about something, but have no burning desire to write about anything, and my mood is basically neutral. but a-ha, that sentence reminded me of a thought i had the other day. it's one of those thoughts that comes and goes from time to time. about how i feel the need to write, but have no real message to convey in my writing. and if that negates my existence as a writer.

"you, person, no longer exist. as a writer, we mean."

anyway... i'm kind of obsessive about new college diarylanders, i have to admit. i like to know who everyone on the ring is, and if i do not, i feel antsy. and it excites me to no end when i find someone not on the ring. and i get sad when someone leaves the ring or just stops writing at all. i've been known to pester people in person for not writing.

i don't think it's anything sinister, really. i just really like discovering people's human-ness. we hide so much, and usually it's the most beautiful parts. i don't like that.

today, in training, we played jeopardy, and i won, which wasn't really much of an accomplishment, but i got to have first pick in the bag o' prizes. and i got a highlighter! for some reason this excited me immensely. it's triangle shaped and has a different colored highlighter one each point. the assistant trainer (who i'm trying not to crush on because she talks about her boyfriend a lot) says they work really well. for some reason they made me almost feel like i could do my thesis. the motivation was nice.

(this song on the radio is a barry white song that i've DEFINITELY heard sesame street do a parody of with cookie monster.)

i think i'm going to wait till tomorrow with more of the up the down staircase stories.

(link: today john sent out our working assets ballot, for where we want our money allocated, and one of the options was adbusters. i've heard that in their old age, even they have become commercial, but i still like 'em.)

*listening to: *
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