*cinderella 2001-05-04 1:40 a.m.*

She wondered sometimes. What was going to happen. What was going to happen at the

end of her story. If it was going to be happily ever after. (But this was before that

particular phrase existed. It�s partly her fault that it does.)

She wanted someone to rescue her. Some consider this a psychological disorder

these days. I don�t think she had a psychological disorder. I think it was the time. And

the stepsisters.

Not that the stepsisters were evil. I feel like that has gotten exaggerated with time.

No, really, they were just the type of people who got annoying if you had to live with

them. Not bad people. Just inconsiderate. I mean, remember, at this time, people were

getting married in what is now called �adolesence,� when people are �teenagers� (a very

modern phenomenom, the idea of teenage), and this was before any of them had �caught a

man,� so they�d have to be 14 at the oldest. And 14-year-olds are just annoying.

Especially to each other. It�s part of the job description.

So, they weren�t really evil. But it�s not really too much of an exaggeration to say

that Cinderella was all goodness and light. I don�t know how she did it. She probably had

all those kinds of eating disorders and mental disorders and self-floggings that people had

in those days. Was it St. Teresa that was supposedly anorexic? I, personally, think that

Cinderella must have been bulimic. That whole self-torture thing. I bet she thought she

was evil.

I bet her stepsisters thought the same thing. Anastasia and Drusella as Disney

would like us to think their names were, were probably always thinking to themselves how

evil Cinderella was. I bet they thought she got all the attention.

Anyway. Cinderella. Hasn�t gotten to the ball yet. She�s still sitting around

waiting for someone to rescue her. And who really knows who got her off of her

floor-scrubbing, grovelling ass in order to actually want to go to the ball. I have this

image of her sitting in the cinders, day in, day out, waiting for Prince Charming, hair back

in Disneyfied dew rag. Yes, she�s singing cheesy songs in my head. Damn Disney.

So, if this is the Disney story, she had mice named Gus and Jacques, whispering in

her ears about the ball, and birds singing, and evil cats and a dog. And they made her a

dress.

I don�t think that actually happened. The rest I can buy. But the dress? The

�Cinderelly� bit? That�s a bit of a stretch.

So they didn�t make her the dress, but they did inform her about the ball. And this

caused her to make her own dress.

I bet what you see is her gleaning bits of fabric here and there. I don�t know,

maybe she went and gathered wool or rabbit fur that got stuck in barbed wire (which

probably didn�t exist at this time in history), maybe she crushed nettles under her feet.

Who knows? But I think she stole the material. From... let�s say Drusella here for

argument�s sake, but you know, it could have been Anastasia. I�m not sure. But these

girls, these spoiled girls, had like 85 dresses in a time when most people had 2 dresses

their entire lives. Except for royalty, who had hats made out of doll�s houses and

elaborate cakes and things. And these stepsisters. They had lots of dresses, so Drusella

never saw it was missing.

But it started to eat away at Cinderella. Remember, she�s all goodness and light at

this time. This was before marriage turned her bitter and sour and Prince Charming died

and she married some other prince who had a daughter with hair as black as coal and skin

as white as snow (and a sister who married a bear, but that�s another story). But she has

this dress. This stolen dress. It eats away at her. Even more than this need for a hero ate

away at her. This dress eats at her soul.

Finally, in a frantic fit of desparation, she tears at the dress, shreds flying

everywhere, hair bedraggled, etc.

At which point maybe the prince walks by and sees her and thinks she�s a

prostitute. A gorgeous prostitute. A prostitute with a stunning collar bone and elegantly

nibble-able ear lobes. A prostitute recently ravaged.

So he takes her, knows her, they play a nice game of parcheesi as they say.

A few months later, it becomes rather obvious that our dear sweet Cinderella is not

so virginal as she would like us to believe.

And so they have this fantastic wedding gala. They sing �So This Is Love� at each

other. Jacques and Gus make excited mouse noises. The dog�s dead, so he doesn�t show

up. Drusella and Anastasia are off galavanting somewhere else.

And they live happily ever after. Or something.

*listening to: *
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